firbank’s juvenilia

From a fragment of a short story written at the age of about twelve:

Mrs Keston put the dog in its basket, tidid her hair before a mirror, langwidley sat down and calved a chicken.

[A girl at a boarding school told to eat up the underdone beef she had left on her plate replies:]
‘I have quite enough blood in my family without going to a bullock for more.’ ”

(Ronald Firbank, The New Rythum and Other Pieces, p. 115.)

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